My name is Joshua. I've struggled with anxiety disorders since childhood and have been diagnosed with an array of anxiety disorders, depression and ptsd. My coping mechanism has always been to isolate and that generally relives the depression and constant anxiety.
I spent nearly all of age 12 through 22 agoraphobic and only leaving my home for things like seeing a therapist. After leading a somewhat "normal" life from age 23 to 28 I no longer felt I could maintain that and I went on ssi disability in mid 2010. Since going on disability I have not worked and rarely left my home.
I don't see myself ever feeling capable of leaving this comfort zone that I've gotten myself into. I'm very happy with how my life is, but I know when change inevitable comes it will be more than a challenge for me to adapt. Baby steps are wonderful and I would much like to baby step through my entire life, but unfortunately the real world requires leaps and that is something I want no part of.