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Christmas time

By: VinterSjel
Mood: Don't know
Date: Dec 06, 2013
Music: None


According to what Iwrote in my former blog entries it’s really easy to see that I do hate my life a lot, don’t see any hope and any sense in it anymore and think that it is completely empty and cold.
The past week was horrible for me, even more horrible than it is normally and I’m really messed up, confused, down and desperate, like always.
BUT, now that it is Christmas time I at least feel a really tiny little warm sparkle of hope and light in the cold darkness which is my life.
Christmas is always helping me and every year at Christmas time, I get a little more quite inside, even if it can’t take away all the pain and restlessness, it helps me and says “There is something beautiful – Christmas ! And that is what even you have. Christmas even comes to you, when nothing is there in your life; Christmas is and always will be. And there is no one who can ever take it away from you, it will stay.”
And that is a great thing and I really do like Christmas and always look forward to Christmas time the whole year.
Yes, Christmas, like every holiday is showing me once more that I’m lonely, but that’s how it always is, so it doesn’t matter.
I love Christmas and it has the power to help me a bit and that is wonderful.



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From: Bernie_
December 8, 2013, 1:54 am

My friend, there is no reason to hate your life and there IS hope, always!  Your very young yet and a whole lot will change through your life.  Your going to go through "up's and down's".  Life is a "challenge" and I hope you will take that challenge and fight for a better life.  Things don't change fast but, they are always changing.  I'm sure there are things you can do daily to make those changes for the better.  You do have to keep a positive attitude if at all possible.  I know there are going to be days where that's hard but, TRY.  Look for things you can do to improve your life.  I know....  you have depression and so do I and many others.  I've been fighting it for about 20 years that I know of.  I've had some very low periods but, things can and will get better.  I HOPE I'm not sounding like I'm "pushy", I just would like to see you find hope and to do what you can to feel better.

I'm very happy that you can find happiness in the Christmas season.  Yes, there is something beautiful (Christmas).  The fact that you like Christmas tells me that you are a very good human being.  I hope that in itself will make you feel better.  Please, keep your chin up and strive for a better life which is what you deserve.  
 



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December 7, 2013, 3:50 pm

I'm really sorry to hear that :(



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“ραяαησια ιѕ נυѕт тнє вαѕтαя∂ cнιℓ∂ σƒ ƒєαя αη∂ gσσ∂ ѕєηѕє.''ρøøƦ †hιπĝ. lε†'$ αδøρ† ι†, ĝιυε ι† α lα$† παʍε απδ Ʀαι$ε ι† Ʀιĝh†.' 'уσυ ωαηт тσ gєт ιт α ρυρρу, тσσ؟' '$uƦε. ωε'll cαll ι† ραπιc. ι† απδ l醆lε ραƦαπøια cαπ ρlαψ †øĝε†hεƦ α† †hε ραƦκ απδ $cαƦε †hε hεll øu† øŦ αll †hε ø†hεƦ κιδ$.” ─ [ᴅ.ᴅ. ʙᴀʀᴀɴᴛ ]
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December 6, 2013, 6:09 pm

That's great u find it so energising! I find it exhausting and emotionally draining :-(



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