Depression

I'm a creative soul of Celtic origin - and during my 'up' times I paint, write, play guitar, buy & sell jewellery (mainly costume and vintage). I love nature, travelling, exploring cities, towns and countries, visiting markets and curio shops, watching good films, reading, listening to music, cooking, eating and generally soaking up all life has to offer. During my down times I'm a depressed hermit who feels glued to the chair, with a head full of messy chaos and dark memories. I've been unfortunate enough to have had a pretty depressing and very lonely childhood, homes, foster care, living with relatives who'd rather I wasn't there, running wild devoid of parental love, care, nurturing, understanding and guidance, and I now only have a very sick mother in the way of family. Depression and alcoholism run in the family and I battle most days just to stay afloat. But I work hard at it, because despite it all I do actually love life. I thrive off open, honest communication and mutual support, which is something I don't get enough of. I don't seem to have the tools to maintain friendships and relationships for more than a few years, as people scatter when I start to unravel! But I have a lovely man in my life who gives me time and space to express myself, for whom I am so very grateful. I hope, from this site, to share my experiences of depression and to hopefully gain some insight and survival techniques and communicate with people who understand.
Thanks for reading.

Art that moves me . buying & selling jewellery . music that moves me . playing guitar . food . wine . films . Sherlock Holmes . Love . nature . the sea . travelling . exploring . mermaids . painting . yoga . swimming . the steam room . pilates . feeling good . my lovely boyfriend . lazy hazy sunny days . snow . thunder storms . starry nights .

Banality . rudeness . indifference . lack of basic manners . stagnation . corporate enclosures . feeling depressed . loneliness . feeling so complicated

I like too much to mention...easier to say I dislike Rap, most Hip Hop, sleezy R&B, Gangsta stuff, clubby commercial dance music, pop-factory drivel, European folksy stuff, Chinese opera...
But I do like good singer/song writer stuff, classical, operatic, funk, soul, classic pop, 70s disco, The Cure, The Smiths, Everything But The Girl, Prince, James Brown, Northern Soul, Annie Lennox, Sade, Depeche Mode, Bowie, Talking Heads, ooooh, there's so much to like.

Sherlock Holmes (I'm addicted), most 'who dun it' mystery stuff, historical fact and historical novels, survival stories (A Million Little Pieces and the like), Talking Heads, About A Boy, Biographies on people I'm bothered about, Albert Camus, Bronte stories, Wuthering Heights (first book I ever read) and Dhal stories.

Any Tim Burton film, fantasy films with goblins, dragons, wizards, fairies and magic, Broke Back Mountain, Batman, The Officers Ward, Withnail and I, Amelie, Shine, The Deer Hunter, The Blues Brothers, The Life of Brian, Kiss of the Spider Woman, Like Water for Chocolate, Dracula, Interview with a Vampire...and so many, many more!

painting . collage . playing guitar . buying and selling jewellery . collage . reading . cooking . camping . snorkelling and diving . swimming . walking . history .