Depression Tribe

I love my kids aometimes things get rough and hard for us but we have been doing well...newest would be in my blogs...I added photos to my profile, I thought about some of what everyone has been telling me, to find some positive to focus on and these people in my gallery and I am missing some but these I had and they are important to me!

Truth is I'm miserible.....I've thought about suicide....but something always stops me...I'm 38 this April, I have stepstones 5 boys 19, 18, 17, 14,11 and one 13 yr. old daughter, a sweetheart when she wants to be..lol,....have an ok job now..but a long hour comute..hate what my ex has done to us all mentially but comes to a point where i dont wish him dead anymore...he'll go in his own time i don't have to stress out myself about that,....I have to become a strong woman for my future grandchildren.....thats my GOAL!! my sister died from brain cancer I like the games on here,and slowily I have been opening up to make new friends and find a few old ones from my last page I deleted. Fixing my broken fences and repair bridges. I'm here, if anyone would like to chit chat.

P.S. I have a great sence of humor, a huge heart, I can be very kind, forgiving, I know there are always two sides to a story and I am learning to hear them out before I take any action.


MY BIGGEST Problem, is focusing on the negitive in stead of the positive, and when I hear myself doing it I want to stop change it but i dont I dont realize how, I live in Amsterdam New York, I have my kids my pets, and my boyfriend, we dont live together i wish we did but i think problems would get worse,so we do what we can to see each other now, and I have my work and he his so things are different kids listening to me and going to school without fighting and being called out of school some days can be hell, i dont know i come here for refuse from the world and myself I usually find someone here who is either going through the same or something way worse than me that i can comment to in hopes of bringing someone else up as well

Scrabble....Bowling...Driving..Shopping for others.....Cooking & Baking mostly when the kitchen is clean or I won't do it!....Fishing if I dont have to put everyone elses worms on, my own worms are ok but my kids just let the fish eat the worms....having a Ice Cream Cone on a Hot Day....Planting stuff.... being in love feeling the love back most of all...sitting in the morning sunshine...waking to a warm hug from a man

Rats, Snakes, most bugs, buttholes who speed down side streets in 30 mph kids zones, alot of stuff...........if i leave the strings on my tea bags in a travel cup and I drink and the 'rats tail ' i call it comes out....i am mortified yuck!

Most

Have lots Read Few...i use them when I want to look something up mostly reference self help kind of books

Funny ones Laugh my ass off, Action movies I prefer to be with a mate when I watch any movie, I prefer no Horror

Mothers
Scrabble	Challenging self hatred